"Somebody"

This version was shared by my mission president's wife, Sister Blood (this is Adam, hijacking Jaci's blog today)

SOMEBODY

'Somebody' said a mother is an unskilled laborer....
'Somebody' never gave a squirmy infant a bath.

'Somebody' said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've had a baby
'Somebody' doesn't know that once you're a mother, normal is history.

'Somebody' said a mother's job consists of wiping noses and changing diapers....
'Somebody doesn't know that a child is much more than the shell he lives in.

'Somebody' said you learn how to be a mother by instinct...
'Somebody' never took a three-year-old shopping.

'Somebody' said being a mother is boring
'Somebody' never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.

'Somebody' said teachers, psychologists and pediatricians know more about children than their
mothers
'Somebody' hasn't invested their heart in another human being.

'Somebody' said if you're a good mother, your child will turn out good...
'Somebody' thinks a child is like a bag of plaster-of-paris that comes with directions, a mold and a
guarantee.

'Somebody' said being a mother is what you do in your spare time...
'Somebody' doesn't know that when you're a mother, you're a mother ALL the time.

'Somebody' said good mothers never raise their voices
'Somebody' never came out the back door just in time to see her child wind up and hit a golfball through
the neighbor's kitchen window.

'Somebody' said you don't need an education to be a mother....
'Somebody' never helped a fourth grader with his math.

'Somebody' said you can't love the fifth child as much as you love the first
'Somebody' doesn't have five children.

'Somebody' said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the books
'Somebody' never had a child stuff beans up his nose.

'Somebody' said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery....
'Somebody' never watched her baby get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten.

'Somebody' said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back
'Somebody' never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell cookies.

'Somebody' said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married
'Somebody' doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter in-law to a mother's heartstrings.

'Somebody' said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home
'Somebody' never had grandchildren.

'Somebody' said being a mother is a side dish on the plate of life
'Somebody' doesn't know what fills you up.

'Somebody' said your mother knows you love her, so you don't need to tell her
'Somebody' isn't a mother.

Note:  When 'Somebody" doesn't have it quite right, a good plan is to look for 'SOMEBODY ELSE,' the
person who really knows the truth. Mothering is a noble profession.